Timor

Well, I’m alive. Sort of.

Have you ever felt that weird phenomenon known as FOMO? “Fear of missing out.”

Sometimes I experience this with people. Where you want to let someone go, but then realize, “Wait, but then I won’t get to _____” and fill in the blank with whatever deserves to go there. Parties, dates, blah blah blah.

It’s a really odd thing to feel, when you’re caught in between people that you want to invest in equally, but you’re afraid of the ramifications; e.g., not being indulged in your drinking habits, or trashy music, or allowed to watch really odd movies (or even accompanied when watching said films.)

But you don’t know which you’d rather sacrifice for the other; there isn’t really an indication of movement in either direction, but you feel hesitant to take the plunge and go all in with one versus the other. All-in meaning actually investing the most time and getting the feels.

This is a ridiculous thing, because I should be able to enjoy myself and not try to sequester myself away with one person who may or may not even want me. “Want me.” That’s another messed up thing: it’s not that someone doesn’t want you, it’s that they just want someone else instead. So does that, in effect, mean that they don’t want you? Or is the lack of emotion indicative of negative emotion?

That’s something I don’t ever understand. And probably will not be able to figure out. Is the lack of something automatically indicative of the negative? Or does it indicate neutrality? In physics, it means balance. But I don’t know if the lack of feeling for someone indicates that they just don’t feel anything towards you. I suppose that there are people in my life that I think of and don’t feel anything. But I’m not 100% sure. I’m sure that I will name that one “Clotho”. The thread of life. But I digress.

FOMO is a real issue, people. It affects many people daily.

Help stop FOMO. Donate now. Save a life.

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